Facing reality means accepting that sometimes things go wrong. This goes for your personal life as well as your business. You can’t always plan for things like a family emergency or an unexpected turn in your business. So what do you do when things don’t go as planned? I’ll give you some tips for reframing unexpected challenges in your handmade business, making a new plan, and taking away something positive from the situation.
Today we’re going to be talking about when it hits the fan and what to do about it. So if you have been in one of those places in your business where nothing is going as planned or one thing goes wrong and it kind of derails all of the things, we’re going to talk today about how to handle those things—strategies for staying on track and things like that. So welcome.
Transcript: When Things Don’t Go as Planned in Your Handmade Business
As you know, having it hit the fan is going to happen to all of us. And I want to have as many people prepared and ready to deal with things as possible. So why are we talking about this? Well, just so you know what’s going on with us, let me tell you the last couple of weeks have been really, really hard.
Getting Personal: Unexpected Family Challenges
So if you saw my last Crochet Business Chat—it was two weeks ago—about five minutes after that video ended, I told Kevin, “Hey, your brother’s not up and around. It’s not normal for him.” He was visiting us here from Florida. I said, “I think you need to go check on him.” And Kevin walked in there and found his brother having a stroke. And he had been having a stroke for hours. It might be up to 10 hours that he was in there struggling.
So it was not a good scene. It was horrible. I was immediately on the phone with 911. As you know, we live very rurally. It took the ambulance 30 minutes to get here so we were … Anyway, it was it was really hard. And we spent the day in the hospital. We spent a lot of time in the hospital, going to our local hospital and then driving up to Colorado Springs as he was airlifted there.
And after that, family flew in. His son and daughter flew in, one from Florida, one from North Carolina. Kevin’s other brother flew in. His other brother drove down from Loveland, Colorado. We had a house full of people last week. House was full of people. All of the brothers were supposed to be on a vacation together. It was my one week of the year that I have the house to myself. So I had lots of plans of what we were going to do here in our business and getting the house finally unpacked and decorated. So none of that happened.
Plot Twist: More Unplanned Struggles
Everyone has gone home now. Tim is in rehab. He will be there for several weeks. He’s getting better every day but he was paralyzed on his whole left side. Now he’s getting movement back and that’s really positive so that’s good.
But then Hurricane Ian struck and our daughter and her family, our three granddaughters … Tim who is in the hospital, he’s from Fort Myers. Our daughter is from Pine Island. So they were hit very hard with the hurricane. Thankfully, Tim’s house just has minor damage so his son’s going back there to fix it up and get it handicapped-ready for him when he comes home.
Destiny and the girls and her partner, Josh, they have lost all access to their home and don’t know when they’ll get back, don’t know when the girls will be back to school. I understand the girls have lost some friends possibly in the flooding. It’s pretty bad. And so we’re working on supporting them through that and trying to find a place to live. And I’m trying to get some work while they’re waiting to get back home.
So it’s been a lot. And nothing goes as planned. Nothing has gone as planned and we’re just plugging away, trying to manage. I want you to know that these kinds of things are bound to happen. And when you run a business, it’s hard to stay on track.
So I had already been struggling with some health issues and some burnout before this happened. And the issues with the house being finished. So anyway, not to be a downer. I’m just telling you things happen, and as a business owner, you have to go on. I want to talk about how to do that.
The Ups and Downs of Life and Business
First, I just want to say it’s important to recognize the reality of the truth. If things are bad right now, they will get better. But also, if things are good, they’re going to get worse. And that’s not to be a pessimistic kind of person. It’s to be grounded in reality. Life ebbs and flows, and business ebbs and flows, and life and business are just connected. So whether it’s your business is going up and down or your personal life is going up and down, all of that’s going to affect your business.
So as a business owner, it’s your job to seize the moment of unplanned events. If they’re positive, look at them as opportunities and seize the moment. Jump on them and make the most of them.
And it’s your job to be resilient when they’re not positive—when you face disappointments, when you face struggles when you face unplanned events. We build resilience and we move on. So that resilience might look like doubling down on the work. If your sales are not going as you hoped, if you’re not getting the reach that you wanted, those kinds of things indicate double down. Look at what’s working. Look at what’s not working and make a new plan.
But if it’s something like what we’re going through, sometimes that looks like you just need to rest. You just need to take care of yourself. There are a lot of things going on that you can’t control. And just focus on what you need to do to take care of yourself.
Where to Focus When It Hits the Fan
So it’s up to you to decide and to recognize and discern what you need to do. Do you need to double down on the work or do you need to pull back on the work and take care of yourself? So that’s what we’re going to be addressing today, when things don’t go as planned. So I’m going to share just some bullet points of things to focus on when things don’t go as planned.
Get to Acceptance
First, acceptance. If you don’t get to acceptance, you’re going to be fighting reality. So I always tell this to my husband. My husband is amazing. He’s wonderful and he’s very, very emotional. So when things go wrong, he stays in that emotion, whether it’s disappointment, anger. Usually it’s disappointment or anger about the situation.
And I told him, “You’ve got to get to acceptance. You’ve got to get to accept this is what it is so that we can then make a plan to move forward.” So until you get to acceptance, you’re just stuck in that place. Acceptance will take you to a place where you can say, “Okay. This is what it is. Now what are we going to do about it?”
In my counseling practice, I worked with women whose spouses were struggling with sex addiction. And we always ended our time together with the Serenity Prayer plus a bonus at the end. So Serenity Prayer goes like this. And I hope I say it correctly. “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” So we would say that. And then we would add on the end, “and the willingness to take action,” because it’s the action that will get you where you need to go. So recognizing what you can and cannot control, making decisions, and taking action
Have Grace for Yourself and For Others
Next is having grace for yourself and for others. Sometimes when we get a negative review or we have a customer that’s having issues, our first response is either to get angry with them, or to feel victimized, or to be angry with ourselves for letting people down. And as long as we’re doing that—as long as we’re stuck in the anger—we’re not actually making progress forward.
So find grace for people who are treating you poorly. And have grace for yourself when you make mistakes. That will help you learn lessons that will help you move forward with that customer and make things right. Or just let go of the situation if you just need to. Let go of someone who gives you a bad review.
Focus on Good Enough
Focus on good enough. So often we are stuck in perfectionism. When things go wrong, we think, “If only I did it better. If only I did it better. If only I did it better.” And we’re so focused on being perfect that we don’t make progress. So focus on good enough.
And then making a new plan to move forward. So that’s what I had to do with the Holiday Prep Challenge that we’re doing this week at Crochetpreneur. It was supposed to be last week. And I was like, “You know what? I don’t have time to prep because I’m running back and forth to the hospital every day. And I’m taking care of guests, and cooking meals, and doing all of that. So I’m going to focus on good enough. And I know that good enough is good enough.”
That’s the thing, as we look at good enough, is not good enough. So it’s like we distort things in our head. Yes, it’s not perfect. Yes it’s not the most amazing thing I’ve ever done. But it’s going to be good. So I don’t want you to feel like, “Oh, it’s only good enough. I don’t want to participate.” No it’s good. So we have to let go of that perfectionistic—let go of the expectations, and stay with reality, and be okay with good enough.
Practice Gratitude
Next is practice gratitude. So often, again, when we’re focused on the negative, and we’re focused on what could have been, and we’re focused on what makes us angry, we’re not making progress forward and we’re not moving towards our goals. We’re just going to stay stuck in that negative.
So if you can practice gratitude, if you can say, “Well, I’m so grateful that this didn’t this didn’t happen,” “I’m so grateful for the lesson,” or, “I’m so grateful for the positive that’s come out of a negative situation.”
With Destiny and the girls, they’ve really seen people step up to help them. They’re going to move in with Destiny’s boss for a short time. And she’s got friends who have power, who are like, “Come to our house. Just relax for a little bit. Take a shower.” People are really reaching out and stepping up. So being grateful for that. Yes, they’ve lost a lot. Yes, they can’t get to their home. Yes, the girls can’t get to school. But they have seen love and support.
So focusing on that and being grateful for what is rather than regretting or being upset about what’s not. You can have both, actually. But if you have the sadness without the gratitude, you’re really going to struggle.
Keep Your Cool
Keep your cool, especially when you get negative reviews, especially when customers are complaining. Try to take emotion out of it. We talk a lot about crochet CEO perspective and how CEOs do not let their emotions make the decisions for them. So when you take a breath, keep your cool, and take a look at things logically, and figure out a plan. You’re more likely to have a positive outcome. So even when things are going wrong, you can still take a step back, and take a deep breath, and say, “Okay, what can I do now?” rather than just blowing your top.
Adapt and Be Flexible
Next is adapt and be flexible. So again, just like I had to do with the challenge, being flexible and saying, “Okay, it’s not going to happen the way that I wanted it to happen. So I’m going to make decisions that I can’t.” For me, I said, “I’m going to move it forward a week. It’s going to give me some breathing room. It’s going to let me get the word out about things, and get my graphics done, and all of those things.” So if you can be flexible and not be super rigid, you’re going to be able to address difficult times more easily.
Assess Your Options
Then assess your options. In my practice, I’m always telling people there’s 21 solutions to every problem. So often, we get stuck in black-and-white thinking, or either/or thinking, or, “It didn’t happen the way I want so now it’s done.” But if you will take a look at it and say, “What possible options are there?”
Or you can ask someone else, “What would you do in this situation?” and you can hear from other people what options would be for them. Sometimes we just don’t see the options. So what I would like for you to do in any situation is to say, “I’m going to write down five to ten options here. I could go for a walk. I could pray and meditate. I could reach out to the customer and ask how I can help. I could send an apology.” Whatever it is that that might happen.
It could be things you would never do but write it down. It’s an option. Take a look too at those options that you would never do. Sometimes you’ll realize that that might be the best option. And maybe you need to do the thing that you think you would never do, depending on what the situation is.
Make a New Plan
So once you once you check out your options make a new plan, don’t just say, “Well it that didn’t happen the way I wanted so I’m giving up on the whole thing.” So often, people do this in diet culture, right? “It didn’t go the way I wanted. I accidentally ate a cookie,” or something like that, “and now the whole thing’s out the window. I can’t do it. I’m done.” And in the end, you’re just sabotaging your ultimate goals for yourself—the goal for health, or the goal for weight loss, or whatever.
And it’s the same thing in business. Don’t sabotage your end goal. Don’t sabotage your dreams just because one thing goes wrong. Don’t be that kind of fatalistic, nihilistic personality rather, or victim, helpless, powerless personality. Instead, say, “What can I do instead? How can I make it good enough?”
Learn the Lesson
Next, learn the lesson. Sometimes there are lessons to be learned in any negative situation. Sometimes there’s not. What’s the lesson when a hurricane hits your home? Don’t live on an island? Don’t live the life of your dreams because something bad might happen? I don’t think so. I think the kids are going back to the island. That’s the place they love. That’s where their community is. I think they’re going back.
So really check in with the lesson. Is the lesson, “Be prepared?” Is the lesson, “You did a good job. You got out. You found safety. You didn’t stay behind and put your children at risk,” that kind of stuff?
Then, so in business, you know whatever the lesson needs to be of, “Oh, I need to be more consistent,” or, “Oh, I need to say the same thing over, and over, and over again before someone pays attention to it. Uh oh. My customers don’t read my descriptions of my product. So I need to put some text in my image or I need to put a graphic image to tell them all the details because they don’t read the …” Whatever it is, learn the lesson. And then make a new plan and implement whatever the lesson is.
Ask for Help
Ask for help when you need it. If you don’t already have a coach, I’m here for you. There are other people who are coaches who can help you in your business. Or ask for help from other business owners who might have experienced something similar. You can ask in Facebook groups. You can ask for perspective. You can ask for wording, if you don’t know how to word something, to someone who has maybe had a customer service issue. Or you can just ask for help as in you need a listening ear. It’s really important to know that you’re not alone, no matter what’s going on in your personal life or in your business.
Keep Moving
And then finally, keep moving. Don’t get stuck. Don’t get stuck when things get hard. Don’t get stuck when things don’t go as planned. Remember to accept, check your options, make a new plan, and start taking action. Be willing to take action. It’s a conscious choice. So those are my little tips for what to do when things don’t go as planned. Take care of yourself.
Be Open with Your Customers
Be open with your customers. I feel like I’ve been open with you guys about like, “Hey, you guys. Things did not go as planned. This is what it’s going to look like instead.” So I told you it was going to look one way. It’s going to look another way.” I request grace and forgiveness for that and I’ve received it, which I’m really grateful, for from you guys. So be open. Be vulnerable. Be real with your people and they will be more likely to be gracious to you. That’s the deal.
Wrapping Up
Remember, it’s going to hit the fan at some point. It does for all of us. There will be good times. When there are good times, seize the opportunity and really make the most of it. And when there are bad times, take care of yourself. Take the emotion out of it as much as you can, and make a new plan, and give yourself lots and lots of grace.
