As crochet business owners, of course we want our businesses to grow and thrive. But does that success have to come at the expense of other handmade sellers in the community? I believe that when we put community over competition, everyone benefits. There are enough followers, enough customers, enough money, and enough love to go around. And when we are kind, cooperative, collaborative, and give proper credit, we can build a community where everyone can succeed. Let’s talk about what community over competition does (and does not) mean within the handmade business community.
Can Crochet Business Owners Value Community over Competition?
[00:00:00] Welcome, welcome to Crochet Business Chat. I am so happy to see you all here today. We are going to be talking about community over competition. What do we mean by that? Is it possible? And how can I be a good community member? I’m going to be presenting some thoughts on this and then I’m going to come back. Because we are streaming live, I’m going to come back into the comments and see what you all have to say about it because I think everyone’s voice is important and I would love to hear your experience and your thoughts and ideas. So if you are interested in the crochet community or the crochet business community, this talk is for you.
Transcript: Is “Community over Competition” Possible?
[00:00:53] And I’m so happy to have you here. If you are new here or if you are returning, welcome or welcome back to my channel. My name is Pam Grice and I am the Crochetpreneur. I’m on a mission to help 1,000 women find financial freedom through crochet—and men, too. So if you’re a crochet business owner and you are looking to make more profits and find community, find a place to belong, you’re in the right place. So welcome.
[00:01:24] All right. I see some folks are here. If you’re watching on replay, please let us know you’re watching on replay in the comments. And if you are watching live, won’t you let us know. Are you a designer, are you a product seller, a little bit of both? Or are you a service provider? Or do you sell other things in the realm of crochet? Do you make hooks? Do you make stickers? Do you make yarn swifts, any of those things? We’d love to hear from you and a little bit about what you do.
[00:02:00] So good morning, good morning. I see a lot of returning names that I recognize, a couple new folks. Welcome. So happy to have you here. You guys, I see these names over and over again and you’re so consistent, and you’re so loyal, and you come every Monday, even the days that I’m not here and I’m sick. I so appreciate you. Thanks for being here.
What is Community?
[00:02:27] Let’s talk about our community. Now, I did make a lot of notes and I’m going to walk through my notes because I don’t want to forget. What I was thinking as I was preparing for this. So I do have notes. So the question is what is community over competition and what does that mean anyway, especially in the context of the crochet and crochet business communities? So before we can understand community over competition, we need to understand what a community is. And so often, people look at community as a group of people who are in the same place or a group of people who like the same thing. And while that could be maybe a broad context of community, we’re speaking of a more abstract idea of community.
[00:03:29] So first, a community is about people. So even if the community is happening in a locale, or a location, or a neighborhood, that kind of thing, the community is about the people in that locale or location. And in the context of the crochet community, it’s people with a shared interest, shared goals. And it’s about giving and receiving within the context of that group of people. So in order to be a community, the people inside that community must have a sense of shared trust, belonging, safety and significance.
[00:04:17] And in the realm of psychology, with my clients, we really focused on these ideas of safety, significance, and … What was the other one? I can’t remember the exact word I used. Oh, it will pop into my head. But safety, significance. I belong. I’m important. Oh, and acceptance. I should probably add that to this right here. But I think trust and belonging fit into that acceptance. So I’m safe in this community, I’m important in this community, and I’m accepted in this community. And then we add in here this. I can trust the community.
Helping Others Feel Welcome
[00:05:07] Again these are abstract thoughts, abstract ideas, but when someone doesn’t feel these things—when they’re engaging with the community they don’t feel important, they don’t feel seen, they don’t feel safe, or they don’t feel like they can trust the community, then actually, they feel abused. They feel neglected. And people inside a community shouldn’t feel unseen, and neglected, and abused.
[00:05:42] So that’s just a really important concept to understand—that if I don’t help someone feel seen, I’m actively making them feel unseen. So it’s really a dichotomy in these experiences that people have. They either feel important or they don’t feel important. There’s no in between. They either feel seen or they don’t feel seen. They feel accepted or they don’t feel accepted. They feel like they can trust the community or they don’t feel like they can trust the community. And we, as community members, part of our job being in the community is to help others feel these positive emotions or positive experiences of trust, belonging, safety, and significance. I hope that makes sense. I’m going to come back to the comments and see if that doesn’t make sense.
Shared Identity without Community
[00:06:38] So ultimately, communities are born out of shared experience and shared identity. So I had spoken earlier about neighborhoods. So people who live in a neighborhood have a shared identity if they choose to. I think we’ve all lived in communities where there were people who never said hi, people who never waved to their neighbors, people who never gave out Christmas cards, or made bread for their neighbor, or made cookies to welcome them. And sometimes it’s because they didn’t feel accepted or sometimes because they just didn’t like people. And so people can live in the same locale but not be part of the community.
[00:07:24] And it’s the same with the crochet community. In the crochet business community. People can share the identity but not step into that as part of a community. So someone can say, “I’m a crochet business owner,” but they don’t want anything to do with the community. They don’t want to collaborate. They don’t want to refer other people business. They don’t want to engage with the community. They don’t want to like anyone’s posts. They just don’t want to be any part of it. And that’s their choice but I’m guessing that since you are here today, that you feel differently.
Communities with the Crochet Community
[00:08:04] Another thing to remember is that there are communities within the community. So if we bring it back to the idea of a neighborhood, you might have … I’m going to think back to my old neighborhood. My neighborhood now, we have 10 houses so it’s not it’s not like our old neighborhood where we had 400 houses. But in our old neighborhood, we would have block parties, which would include everyone on the street. So there would be the smaller street or block community within the larger neighborhood community. There would be the community of moms that would get together to play bunco. There’d be the community of homeschoolers who would meet weekly at the neighborhood pool. There would be the guys who would get together and play poker. So that would be a smaller community within the larger community. So again, just because you’re not part of a smaller piece of the community doesn’t mean you’re not part of a larger piece of the community.
[00:09:01] And in the context of the crochet business, it could be … So I’m a part of a group of designers who design for a specific company. So we would be that yarn company’s designers and another person may not be part of that community. But that doesn’t mean they’re excluded from the larger community of crochet designers, and then the larger community of crochet business owners, and then the larger community of crocheters.
[00:09:44] So just because you’re not part of a smaller community doesn’t mean you don’t belong in the larger community. So a lot of times, I think people feel like, “Just because I’m not a part of that group or I’m not part of that group, I don’t feel like I belong in the larger group.” But that’s not true. So that’s a perspective shift we need to make that, “Just because I’m not part of a clique—” which I don’t like that word. But what I mean when I say that is a group of people within the larger community. “Just because I don’t belong to that group of people doesn’t mean I don’t belong in the larger community.”
The Positive Benefits of Being Part of a Community
[00:10:29] So science says that being part of a community has a positive benefit on both physical and mental health. As we talk about the neighbor who never leaves their house, who never waves, who never says hello, their experience in life in general is very different than the experience of someone who … If you know my husband, he’s this guy driving down the road. Everyone waves hi. Everyone says hello. He stops to pull over to chat with the neighbors. That person’s experience is going to be very different than the kind of reclusive person, the one who doesn’t get involved, the one who doesn’t say hello. And so it’ll be a different experience, both as far as their emotional engagement with the community and their emotional experience of the community, and their own mental health and physical well-being.
[00:11:28] So again, choosing to be an active participant in community is not only good for you good, for your business, but it’s good for your mental and physical health as well. So if you didn’t already want to be an active member of the community, just look at this and see that there are so many benefits to you and to others.
Protecting the Crochet Community from Competition
[00:11:53] So because community is so good for everyone who is a part of the community, communities need to be protected. And that is why we come up with the concept of community over competition because once competition enters the community, the members’ experience of trust, belonging, and safety are at risk. And therefore, the community itself is at risk.
[00:12:22] So it’s incumbent upon the community members to protect the community from degradation and from falling apart due to this idea of competition. And competition could be about finances. It could be about customers. It could be about ideologies. It could be about intellectual property. It could be about a whole host of things. But as community members, part of our responsibility of being a good community member is to protect the community.
[00:13:00] And I’m not saying to put the community above the people because the people are the community. And we can parse that out a little bit more when we chat if you want to. Community over competition means putting people and relationships first, and resisting the drive for success and growth at any cost, and resisting the fear that there aren’t enough resources for everyone to thrive.
[00:13:35] So typically, competition happens mostly out of fear. So I see someone came out with a pattern that’s very similar to mine. I see someone selling a product that’s very similar to mine. I see someone making more sales than I’m making. And instead of cheering for that person, so saying, “Wow you’re doing a great job. I want to do a great job, too. What can I change?” you start looking at that person differently you start either internally or even externally competing with that person. We see it in the community where someone might send their followers to attack that other person. This breaks community. It breaks trust and makes the community not safe. We cannot compete with someone and love them at the same time.
The Mindset of Competition versus Community
[00:14:27] And part of being a community, again, is putting the people first. What it looks like to put people first is to love people right. So ultimately this is about, “Am I going to love them or am I going to compete with them?” So the way that I look at it, and the way I encourage you to look at it, is when I compete with someone, I have contempt for them. So competition equals contempt. The competition mindset looks like, “Your success diminishes mine so I must beat you and diminish your success.” And this is what makes the community fall apart.
[00:15:09] And it’s not just success. So, “You getting more followers means there’s not enough followers for me.” So it’s a mindset issue. Those people can follow you, too. You just bring them the value they’re looking for. Bring them the ideas they’re looking for. Bring them the culture they’re looking for and they’ll follow you too. So it’s not just about dollars. Sometimes it’s about attention. Sometimes it’s about recognition. So whatever it is.
[00:15:39] And typically, it goes back to your own childhood wounds and however you get triggered within the community. You start competing with people who you see as ahead of you or doing better than you and then you start to have contempt for them. So competition equals contempt. When I compete with you, I am hoping for your destruction. I’m hoping that I win and you lose. This is not what we want inside of a community.
The Mindset of Abundance
[00:16:14] So the antidote to a competition mindset is a mindset of abundance—believing that there are enough customers, there are enough followers, there’s enough success, and there’s enough love to go around. It’s not hard to believe this but sometimes we have to check in. As soon as you find yourself feeling envy or feeling contempt for someone else, check in with yourself and say, “What is really going on with me? Why am I hoping that that person fails? Why will that make me feel better?”
[00:16:48] And then make some shifts in yourself and say, “But what if there was enough money to go around? What if there were enough customers to go around? What if I can’t make all of the hats for all of the world?” Because you can’t. It just gives you the freedom then cheer other people on, to feel empowered in your own business, and to feel open to collaboration rather than competition.
What Community over Competition Looks Like
Being Kind
[00:17:22] So I know this is all very abstract. So you might be asking, “What does community over competition look like practically? How can live out community over competition as a member of the community?” So first, be kind. Being kind is not hard—being kind to other members of the community. Kindness looks like listening without judgment, allowing other people to have different ideas than you do, and just letting that be.
[00:17:57] If someone has a different idea than you, it doesn’t mean you need to hate them, or cancel them, or ignore them, or send people to attack them. You just say, “All right. Well, they are allowed to believe what they want to believe. I’m allowed to believe what I want to believe. And either we can work together or we can’t.” But it doesn’t mean that I have to then attack them, if that makes sense. Kindness looks like allowing people to be who they are.
[00:18:20] Reaching out. Reaching out to new people in the community, reaching out to hurting people in the community, or just reaching out to someone saying, “You’re doing a good job and I’m cheering for you,” including others. So if you see someone that’s being left out or you see someone who’s new, reaching out and saying, “How can I help you? How can I make you feel included? Oh my gosh, welcome to the community. I’d love to show you around,” that kind of stuff.
[00:18:46] Helping. If someone says like, “Hey, I need help with reaching a new ad network and so I need more page views. Can you help me spread the word?” So helping people that way. Sharing other people’s businesses.
[00:19:04] Forgiving. If someone does or says something either out of naivete or out of making a mistake—being in a place of being able to forgive them and move on rather than holding a grudge, provided it’s not something that is destructive to you. And even so, forgiveness is always best for you anyway. Being grateful and recognizing how far you’ve come and being grateful for the way that the community has helped you get there. Being careful with your words understanding that while other people may not think like you, you don’t need to say mean things to them. And then I’m leading the way. So being an example in the community. So those are some ways to be kind.
Giving Credit where Credit is Due
[00:19:58] Another way to live out community over competition is giving credit where credit is due. A lot of people find that giving credit to a designer feels like something’s being taken away from them, when in reality, while you’re not required … Even if someone asks you to give credit, you’re not required to do that. There’s no law that says you have to do that. However, isn’t it just kind?
[00:20:25] It doesn’t hurt you in any way to say, “Oh, this pattern was designed by such-and-such a person,” and put that at the bottom of your online listings or your social media posts. And that way you’re sharing that other person’s business who has actually helped you by making that pattern. You’re sharing that with the world. It doesn’t hurt you in any way.
Collaborating with Others
[00:20:52] Next, collaborating with others. So a lot of times, people find collaboration to be a threat—say, “Oh, if someone wants to collaborate with me it’s because they want to take from me,” rather than saying, “Collaboration is good for both of us. How can we both win in this situation?” So being part of a community actually opens you up to collaboration and gives you the freedom to collaborate in a space that is trustworthy. So you’re already both in the community. You’re in a community of trust. You’re in a community of safety. It gives you the freedom to collaborate with confidence.
Referring Other People’s Businesses
[00:21:36] And then finally, another way you can be a good community member is by sharing and referring other people’s businesses. So even where I am in business, there are coaches who specialize in things that I don’t specialize in. And that’s why I bring in people to my CBA to do master classes every month because they’re expert at something else. And I’m happy to bring them in because they’re providing a service to my students by sharing their wisdom. And I’m providing a service to them by referring them to my followers. We both win from referring other people’s businesses.
[00:22:22] If you remember what movie—is it Miracle on 30-Something Street?—where the Santa said, “Oh, this store doesn’t sell that. But if you go down to the store down the street, they have that Christmas gift that you’re looking for.” And the customers were so thrilled that Santa was referring other businesses that they came back to his business because they were so grateful. And so oftentimes, referring other people’s businesses is not only good for the other business but it’s good for you as well.
[00:22:58] So those are just four little steps to help you be a better community member but also to live out the value of community over competition.
What Community over Competition is Not
[00:23:11] So now I want to take a look at what community over competition is not because I do think oftentimes people get confused about what community over competition means and they allow it or they use it as a weapon to control other people. So let’s look at it.
Allowing Yourself to be Bullied or Taken Advantage Of
[00:23:30] Community over competition is not allowing yourself to be bullied or taken advantage of. So if someone says, “Hey, will you please shout out my business? No, I’m not going to pay you. No, I’m not going to give you anything free. No, I’m not going to reciprocate. I just want you to be sure to tag me,” or whatever, this is just a small example. But a lot of times, it looks like larger businesses taking advantage of smaller businesses by not paying what they’re worth—mostly not paying what they’re worth—or not reciprocating and saying, “You do something for me but I’m not going to do something for you because I’m bigger than you are.”
[00:24:13] So community over competition does not say you have to give in to that because that is not good for you. So you get to still own your worth in the midst of community over competition. So community over competition is not requiring that you sacrifice yourself for others—like I said, working for free, relinquishing your rights, or giving up on your integrity.
[00:24:40] Something that, as I was writing this, that came to mind was the example of if someone blatantly infringes on your intellectual property rights. For example, they take your pattern, and they rewrite it and say they wrote it, and they are selling it on their website. Or they download your pattern and then they sell it on their own website. Or they are selling a similar product to yours and they take all of your listing content, your copy, and they put it on theirs because it’s the same product. And so they just basically steal your description and use it on their own. And they may even take your pictures. They can’t do that. And standing up for your rights in that sense.
[00:25:26] Or if someone has taken your trademark and used it inappropriately, you get to stand up for your rights and not be the bad guy. Community over competition doesn’t say, “You have to give up your rights in order for me to infringe on those rights.” The bad guy gets to be the bad guy. You don’t have to be the bad guy in that situation.
Staying in an Unsafe Community Relationship
[00:25:53] Next is staying in an unsafe relationship with other community members. So inside of a community, oftentimes there are people who are unsafe or who feel unsafe to you. And sometimes it’s because they’ve proven that they’ve said one thing and done another. There’s a lot of negative things that go on in communities. And if someone has done you wrong, you can forgive them but that doesn’t mean you need to be in relationship with them. If someone has proven that they’re toxic, that doesn’t mean that you have to live with that. You get to excuse yourself from that relationship. You don’t have to be in relationship with toxic people. Ultimately, you get to be a wise business owner in the midst of a safe community.
[00;26:49] And even if the community starts to feel unsafe—which I kind of feel like may be happening in the crochet business community right now. And I think it’s kind of a cyclical thing that the community starts to feel unsafe then it makes an adjustment. Then it’s okay for a while. Then it starts to feel unsafe again. You get to be wise in that and say, “This doesn’t feel good. This doesn’t feel good for my business. This doesn’t feel good for me emotionally. And so I need to take a step back.” You’re allowed to do that and still be a good community member.
Is Community over Competition Possible?
[00:27:31] So if we look at it the way that I have described community over competition means collaboration over contempt, and it means that we all win, ultimately it’s again about the people. We all get to win. It’s not about one person wins and one person loses. So is it possible? Do you think it’s possible? I’d love to hear in the comments what you think. Is it possible to have a healthy community and to live out the values of community over competition?
[00:28:09] Ultimately, a healthy community requires self-awareness on the part of the individual members and on the part of the community as a whole. It requires a shared culture and norms. So for me, in the community that I feel safest in, other people in the community also believe in integrity. Other people in the community also believe in intellectual property rights and abiding by those. Those are cultural norms that are really important to me. And if those norms are broken, I don’t feel safe and then I excuse myself from community with those particular people.
[00:28:48] It means inclusivity and love. It doesn’t mean I go around looking for people that I can cancel or looking for people I disagree with. Instead, it’s about saying, while I may disagree with some things, how can I connect with this person in a way that feels good to both of us? How can I love this person even if we disagree? It means grace. It means intention. It means thinking about how are my actions going to impact the community? How are my words going to impact the community?
[00:29:23] It requires a negotiation. Any relationship requires negotiation. And so as being part of a community, we negotiate what is what is the community going to accept? What is it not going to accept? So me being a leader of my own crochet business community, I will accept kindness. I will accept integrity. I will not accept throwing people under the bus. I will not accept trademark infringement. Those kinds of things.
[00:29:51] It requires maturity, which I think is lacking oftentimes. And it requires positive regard for other members. So as a therapist, I believe in unconditional positive regard. I don’t require that of the other people in my community but I do think that when we look at someone else, we start the relationship with positive regard. We start the relationship thinking the best of that other person until they prove us wrong.
[00:30:23] So conflict happens when these values are not shared amongst the members. And I think that we have seen that in the community. We see it often in the community. Differing values tend to clash. But it’s okay that people with these values do their thing and people with these values do their thing. We can all have, again, smaller communities within the larger community and we can coexist.
Being a Healthy Member of the Community
[00:30:57] So how do I know if I’m being a healthy member of the community? So this is what it looks like to be a healthy member of the community. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. So if someone breaks trust, breaks integrity, creates an unsafe environment, believe them. When they’re basically showing you who they are, you don’t have to be in relationship with them.
[00:31:19] And then do your best to build trust, belonging, safety and significance with the other people in the community—new people, old people, people that you may have had conflict with before. Why not try and restore that relationship unless they’re a toxic person? Apologize, forgive, and spread kindness. I personally believe community over competition is possible if we just believe in abundance and if we would just love one another. How about you? What do you think? Do you think it’s possible? I think it’s possible.
Community Q&A
[00:32:00] So I’m going to come over to your comments and see what you think. We have sellers. We have designers. LeNor says, “We should build each other up we’re not cookie cutters and all the same but we can learn from each other.” That’s so right.
[00:32:47] Maungo—I hope that’s how you pronounce it. She said, “I was listening to something today that said it’s important to also assure your community so that they don’t feel threat by being part of the community. Like you say, competition can be a threat.” Yep.
[00:33:08] Let’s see. Lou Lou’s Treasure Trove. “I’m happy to hear you speaking on this subject and I’m happy that I am happy and do not have energy to attack or compete with anyone at my this point in my life.” Yes. A lot of times, those attacks happen because that person is not happy within themselves or they’re not happy with their life and so they project that onto other people. And they’re like, “I’m just going to make everybody miserable.” So I’m happy that you’re happy too.
[00:33:39] Kitty says, “I agree with what you said about being kind. It doesn’t take too much energy to be kind and supportive but it does take a lot of energy to be the opposite.” You’re right. And I’m not talking toxic positivity. I’m not I’m not talking about you don’t get to have your feelings. People are allowed to have their feelings. I just don’t want to get sucked into the drama that isn’t mine. And if someone is wanting to create drama and bring the energy into a negative space in the community, we don’t have to buy into that. We can just step away from that and be like, “I’m not going to do that with you.” Thanks.
[00:34:26] Lou Lou says, “I pray you get many thumbs up,” which reminds me. If you’re enjoying this video, be sure to hit the thumbs up. Be sure to subscribe for more crochet business tips and tricks and hit the notification bell so you get notified every time I go live. Thanks, Lou Lou. I just saw something and it disappeared. Let’s see.
[00:34:58] Cathie said, “Possible, yes. But it takes work and desire by all community members.” Yes. You are so right. Eventine says, “I believe it is possible as long as there’s healthy ways to deal with disagreement, not one manipulating, intimidating, attacking another and it being acceptable.” Yes. So like I said before, communities negotiate. They negotiate conflict rather than, attacking, canceling, and doxing, those kinds of things. “I think it’s possible.” “It’s possible.” “Yes, it’s possible.” Kitty says, “Yes it’s possible. I believe in live and let live instead of the concept of survival of the fittest. The community is so much better.” Yes. Kim says she thinks it’s possible.
[00:35:59] Gayle says she uses the hashtag #communityovercompetition on every post. That’s good. And it’s a good way to remind yourself kind of where you want to come from. So you’re saying, “I’m coming from a community over competition mindset.”
Accepting Each Other’s Humanity
[00:36:17] Ellen says, “There seems to be so much conflict lately, so much, ‘You have to accept my beliefs or I’m going to publicly ridicule you until you submit.’” Yeah. That’s not my favorite. I don’t like seeing it. I think it’s terrible for the community. And actually, I’m coming from a therapeutic place. Not allowing other people to hold their own beliefs or have their own thoughts is actually intellectual abuse. And so when you see people doing this, recognize that the person being attacked, whether you agree with them or not, is actively being abused by this other person.
[00:37:00] It is okay to disagree. It’s okay to even say that you disagree. But it’s not okay to ridicule, cancel, and attempt to destroy another person in their business because you disagree with them, and especially because they made a mistake. We have to allow humanity. Once a community stops allowing people to be human, the community itself is going to fall apart. And I don’t want to see that. I think our community is too important to allow that to happen.
[00:37:36] Wendy says, “I agree that it’s possible. It definitely requires grace, leading by example, and looking for common ground.” Exactly. And that’s what maturity looks like. Right. Thank you for that. Let’s see.
Asking Someone to Leave the Community
[00:37:57] Elizabeth asks, “Have you ever had to ask someone to leave your community or does it happen organically if there’s a split?” For me, I don’t ask them to leave. I just block them from the community. If someone is actively coming into my community and being toxic, I don’t have time for that because, like I said, people show you who they are. Like I’ve had someone come into my community and attempt to steal my followers to come over to them and talk bad about me in the community. I’m like, “I’m not having that. You’re blocked.” And that’s that.
[00:38:40] So it depends on my relationship with that person and what the person is showing me that they’re doing. Sometimes it’s just a mistake. And in that case, I might send them a direct message and like, “Hey. What’s going on?” How can we resolve this? So again, trying to figure out.
[00:39:02] Sometimes when I say something that someone disagrees with, they’ll be happy to say, “You’re a horrible person and I’m leaving your community.” Once I posted in my community that I was going to start removing people who are not engaging with the community, who are just there to kind of watch the community, judge the community, but not be part of the community. And that made a lot of people angry and they left. And that was totally fine with me because it saved me the time of removing them. So because part of my values in my community is that you being part of a community means you’re active. It doesn’t mean you’re just there to look or to watch other people be active. It means that you actually engage.
[00:39:48] Suzanne says, “I totally agree. We are here to lift each other and build our community. Encourage an abundance mindset. There is room for all of us.” Amen. There is room for all of us. All of us get to create the lives that we love, and stay in our own lane, and just do what we want to do, and grow our business the way we want to grow our business, and allow other people to do that for themselves as well. Someone is saying, “I don’t see the comments.” That is likely because you’re on Facebook and most of these people are engaging on YouTube. Wheat State Wool Company said, “You need to cut that little speech out of your video and make it a main post on all of your social medias.”
[00:40:37] Well, I’m going to have to go back and see what you’re referring and let Terri know, because she does my video stuff for me, what to take out. I’m going to have to go back and watch. Sometimes, because mostly I’m talking off-the-cuff—I outline my main ideas but I’m talking off-the-cuff—I don’t even realize what I said. So it’s kind of like going back and reading my essays in grad school and be like, “Wow. I’m really smart. I didn’t realize that until I read what I said or until I watched what I said.”
[00:41:17] Anyway, Tuula says, “Fortunately, the worldwide crochet business community is so big that it’s not necessary to stay with too difficult people.” Exactly. And there are customers for everyone. Amen. She said when I was talking about my view as a therapist. Okay. I’ll go back and listen. Thank you.
Handling Conflict in a Healthy Way
[00:41:41] And VO says, “Life is too short to spend time and energy on disagreement.” That’s right. I’d much rather come to a consensus or agree to disagree and just get on with life. It just makes me so much better.
[00:41:55] Again, I’m not talking toxic positivity. I’m talking about creating relationships and relationships require negotiation. It requires conflict resolution. But healthy relationships never involve I win and you lose. Marriages don’t involve that. Friendships don’t involve that. It always comes down to win/win or compromise. So I hope that we can do that in the crochet business community so that we can all win and we can all enjoy our businesses. And I hope that you will all buy into this and do your best to create a positive community and be kind to one another.
[00:42:44] All right. I hope you all have a wonderful day. And check out [this] video if you want to learn more about community and about crochet. All right, you guys. Have a wonderful day. Bye.
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